February 2012
1 post
Sometimes I don't want to say things outloud
maltyk:
Because then its all out there, all real and shit.
And that makes me uncomfortable.
It’s worked in my favor, for the most part
January 2012
1 post
December 2011
4 posts
June 2011
1 post
April 2011
1 post
Same Old Song...
While the relationship that ended this morning over breakfast needed to end it does make my heart, my head ponder the possibility of feeling/dying alone.
Of course, not in the teen angst ridden years of yesterday but in the current kidney failure, diabetes, heart failure and growing lump in my chest(!) I’m afraid to ask the doctor about of the modern day
If I could even fall “In...
March 2011
2 posts
January 2011
2 posts
“the marijuana goes in the top drawer. The cocaine and speed go in the second...”
– Mouth; Goonies
I was just about to post this when Kay invaded my brain and stole this tumbler post before I could…..I hate you and your books Kay!
4,500 posts!
timfsbrown:
Yeah! I couldn’t have done it without all of you beautiful, nutella-loving, Hannah Montana-hatin hipsters … Thanks, tumblr.
Tim, its been an honor and a privilege.
December 2010
5 posts
In a moment...
I will be in a cabin @ the Mountain celabrating a good friends birthday and I won’t have a care in the world!
Awnaw
Spent the morning making a delicious breakfast and jammin’ to Nappy Roots radio.
November 2010
6 posts
About to found out what the stranger feels like …..3 months of the stranger!
Don’t know how I’ll handle two major holes in my body at once. At least they’re both above the waist. Lol, so I got that going for me
“Screw you and you’re stinkin’ books!”
– Bird
that was the best compliment/insult to date (via malty)
Hahahahaha. Awesome
Waking up early for dialysis makes me privy to late breaking news: such as Greg Oden unable to play for another year. I’ve now become angry @ someone Ive never met. Infuriated actually
Rage
The following is presented in order of fiercest throat punching…
OHSU parking: Nonexistant. Next time i’m due for surgery I’ll be joining a paratrooper unit.
Why so serious?: Must all my docters be without any sense of humor? I’m the motherfucker going through multiple surgerys @
Multiple hospitals through multiple insurance companies. To quote the greatest supporting...
July 2010
1 post
Life:1 Jay:0
May 2010
1 post
just got done with the midnight showing of ironman...
malty: Hi. I’m Kay and I’m a nerd. at least I didnt clap during the movie… like some people… jay… Ahahahahahahaha. Oh its true. Its damn true. Twice even
April 2010
1 post
"I'm an asshole, so what?"
malty:
Saying that you are an asshole doesn’t mean its okay about your asshole ways. Stating this annoying fact and walking around being self rightous and thinking is A-O-Kay.Well, its not ok. Its basically saying ‘no offense but…’. But You Are Being OFFENSIVE! You are an asshole, your actions are not forgivable, learning some fucking manners.
Ps. This goes out to all the self proclaimed bitches...
March 2010
1 post
Home is where the heart is....Also a dialysis...
Portland, I’ll see your beautiful West Hills shadowed skyline Monday night. I’ve missed you so
January 2010
1 post
Old dying Jason, I'd like you to remind youre...
For, from what I can recall, a long enough time at least, I’ve supplanted cocaine for women. The reason behind what I thought was such an absolute was that blow would rarely let me down, nag, bitch or text me every three seconds. If I spent about a hundred and twenty bucks on coke I was guaranteed a decent night. If I spent the same on a woman, there may have, and was, a good chance...
December 2009
2 posts
Wow
I didnt have room to express the immense feeling of relativity to the post I just read. It kills me that I want to write about it but my phone is so primitive that I know I have to wait…
The Aughts: Trying to Say The Things I Can't Say
brokenbirdy: britticisms: We talk about nothing, except for when we talk about Something, in which case our conversations only graze the surface. I don’t know if this is because we are uninformed, or that the subjects are too upsetting and complicated to warrant even an attempt at a thorough conversation. Maybe not we; perhaps just me. I think about all of the things that took place during this...
November 2009
2 posts
Yeaaaah Im gonna have to ask you to work on...
Uhhhh......
Charlotte made me feel alive. The city was alive, the people were accepting, the women were beautiful and welcoming, the city was big and gothic and full of life…….and then……and then I came home. I found a yearning to go back before I even left. To feel that energy. …And then I came home, I was drained within hours. Zapped of all positivity. Caught, uncontrollably, in...
September 2009
4 posts
Reiteration
Portland, I cannot tell you how much I miss you. I am having a rough time here. The honeymoon is over. I’ve always believed, ego aside, that my intuition was of a caliber that is above excellence, and you know what it’s been telling me?……………………………….
…Get the fuck outta here!!!!
But that would be failure...
The White Tragedy....
Once again I must say aloud that I disappoint myself whenever I’ve gotten sober because my need for writing, for my thoughts, goes to shit.
Enemy Mine
Why do I even try to get involved with anyone?
I fall to hard every time since Deanna. I look into these women as if they had a soul, which most of them havent the slightest notion of and the ones that do? Their egos get in the way of the relationship. So what do I do? I reluctantly invest as if they did anyway!!! That’s right, I tell myself the lie, the lie that these types are beautiful...
August 2009
6 posts
Night Moves-Bob Seger
I wish Les was alive so that I could call him and tell him about my moving to Durham, or about an amazing woman, that I work in a kitchen(he would not be happy) or that I just miss him.
I love you Dad
Mysterious Ways.....
That’s the song I heard on my ipod on my morning commute into town. I’m not sure why this song reminded me of someone, but it did nonetheless……and I can’t stop smiling. I feel like a very, very lucky man.
Can you hear me now?
So I tried venting my inner turmoils to a very dear friend back home today but she was eating ice cream and to stoned to talk. This made me want to laugh and cry at the same time because I really need a sound voice that dosen’t live in NC, but you know, she was stoned and eating ice cream. Hahahahaha….Sob……Hahahaha
Home in Home
I wish I was beating the NC heat in Kelly’s O’ right now. That would put a smile on my face. Mmmmmm….”Black and Blue.”
Speechless.....
So many clusterfucked thoughts in my head. I can’t write properly until they’re sorted out.
July 2009
3 posts
Good grief....
Well, I’ve officially arrived in the south. I walked around all day today with sweet baby ray’s sauce all over my shorts. Mmmmmm…..ribs for breakfast
Kinda not really awesome......
While being the perpetual Designated Driver can be appealling from a “people watching” standpoint, it is becoming increasingly BOOOORRRRING! The possitive to that is that I get to drive three or four different cars each week. Sooooo, uhhh….I guess that’s cool right?
I thought so many things I couldn't say....
I’ve wanted to go back to written thought with a viracauty I’ve never known. Since coming three thousand miles into this journey I’ve never had so many thoughts that I’ve wanted to share. Whether random or thought invoking, I’ve never wanted to speak on so many things for as long as I can remember.
I left for many reasons, alot of you thought my relocation was...
June 2009
15 posts
Ugh.....
Me am soooo tried. Made overtime at my newest job. Got a day off yesterday and decided I just wanted to walk Ticker and read and not even leave the property………and then my boss Kiwi, New Zealander.(who’s pretty rad and my next door neighbor) called to ask if I would give him a ride to work since he got plastered last night. “I’m a little short on gas and...
Cultured? Me? Ya' mean like sour cream?
No lie, that was my response when asked if I would start attending performances and whatnots now that I will be working directly across from DPAC (Durham performing arts center). Yeah, I might have aways to go just yet. Hahahahahaha
Bouncing off of Kays Simpsons Quote post....
“No t.v. and no beer make Homer go crazy”
Or, in my current state, “No t.v. and no beer and no blow make Jason retain info, retain erection, retain paycheck, retain some shred of dignity and self-respect.”
Ahhhhhhh.....
Last day off for a couple weeks straight and I spent it reading a whole book in three hours with an iced coffee in one hand and a cigarette in the other. Not bad if ya’ ask me.
Busy Body
Starting 2nd job Wed. All should go well. Picked up two new books, one fict one non. Trying to limit t.v. to wrestling only. Lots of driving. Spending alot of time with the bestest dog ever.